It's Time

So it has been more than 2 months since I lasted posted. And now, here I am, 22 weeks away from my first ironman competition. Without a doubt, I am fully engaged in Ironman training...and I can already say that I've had my ups and downs. While I am a novice triathlete, I am not naive enough to believe that this is going to get easier as time goes on. I am almost certain the highs will become even greater highs, but simultaneously, the lows will become more challenging, darker lows.

Just last week I had a period of almost 48 hours where I felt defeated; the workouts seemed too hard, the days seemed too long, and I kept asking myself, "why am I doing this?" After some sustained sulking, I imposed some serious tough love on myself. "Why?" I asked myself...I'll tell you why. Because I love the way my lungs feel so clear after a fast run on a brisk winter day. Because I love getting to work at 9:00am knowing I've already swam 3500 yds and ran 6 miles that day. Because I am fortunate enough to have two legs that can bike and run. Because I am most productive in all aspects of my life when I am fit. Because I thrive on challenge. Because I signed up for Ironman Lake Placid and said I would. I believed I could. And I can. I will. One day at a time.

Hopeful

After another weekend of eating not-so-well, sleeping in, and gimping around, I'm more than ready to pay my orthopaedic a visit tomorrow to determine whether or not I have a fracture in my knee/leg. I have been able to walk much better this weekend and even navigate the stairs almost normally, but I've had several instances today where I move the wrong way and feel a sharp pain in a very focal spot in my knee. I'm very, very hopeful that it is merely a bruised bone that is reminding me not to jump back into things too quickly...but that remains to be seen.

I have been taking advantage of this "extra" time to get my condo in order. I've done some major cleaning out, as well as sorting, organizing, etc. I bought a file cabinet to file old bills - finally! So in many ways this time off has been productive for me, particularly at work and, as I said, at home. It has been two weeks now since I've worked out. My bike is set up on the trainer in my living room, staring me in the face. It has "war wounds" on the seat from when I fell; a constant reminder of how vulnerable you really are while cycling.

Here's to hoping for a positive report from the doctor tomorrow. My mind and body are well rested. I'm ready to go!!

Today's quote: "The human spirit is to grow strong by conflict."

"Experience tells you what to do; confidence allows you to do it
- Stan Smith

Couch Potato

So I should be about five days into my official IM training program, but a solid crash on my bike almost two weeks ago (Nov. 8th) has turned me into a total lug. Prior to this accident, I had never not worked out for more than maybe 3 days since probably high school.

Even when I fractured my foot 3 years ago, I managed to lie on the floor and do Pilates. I bought new Pilates DVDs in hopes of fulfilling some desire to exercise this time around, but I was quickly frustrated that I wasn't sweating and quit. I should absolutely be lifting weights with my arms, at the very least, and working on core training...but I'm too much of an "all or nothing" person and have convinced myself that if I do not go all the way, I might as well not go at all. I was instructed to keep the wound sterile and not bend the knee. I'm not allowed to swim. It is day 12 with no workout and I'm nuts.

This is not healthy. I am working on it.